Disappointing Night

I went to the Switchfoot concert tonight. I had just
heard about it yesterday so we didn't get tickets in
advance. We thought we could buy them at
the door. But we couldn't because they were all
sold out. So we didn't get in. But we could see them
on a large screen outside the concert hall, and we
could hear them if we stood close enough to the
door. So if you stood in that sweet spot, you could
hear and see them. Needless to say I'm kind of
upset and disappointed that we couldn't see them.
But I am accepting it. The good news is I have $30
in my wallet that I wouldn't of had, had I been able
to see them.

I'm tired of constant teasing, constant criticism. It's
not funny. I need someone to tell me not to pay
attention to what's said. Someone to tell me not to
worry about the way God made me. Someone to tell
me not to be self conscious. I'm fine, I'm just going
through a challenging time right now.

I need to spend more time with Jon. I feel bad always
running off in the evenings, leaving him alone. I don't
know what to do with him though. I guess I could play
games. He sort of makes me sad.

I'd type more but I'm too tired.

God Gave Us Music

I'm so very tired right now so this probably won't be so long.
I had a test in my Theology and a project due in my Video
Editing class. I got through both of them alright. I think the
only reason to be worried about Theology is that there are
only two tests and a paper for the whole class. The test only
had 6 short answer questions on it. I think I did alright. As
good as anyone. I studied quite a bit so I can't really be hard
on myself.

A bunch of people went to a pizza shop for dinner tonight.
But I couldn't, I had my Video Editing class. Kind of a bummer.
Darren went and it sounded like a really fun time. A lot of
good friends were there. Oh well.

I want to be closer to God. I don't take reading my Bible
or praying seriously enough. It seems to be just a habit that
I do every night.

I'm looking forward to singing in The Gathering tomorrow.
Choir is always fun. I wish we had a piano here. I have
the urge to learn some Chopin songs. I really like Chopin.
I want to learn the one my brother learned called Nocturne
in E flat major. It's beautiful. There's just something about
piano music that I really love, and miss right now. It's such
a beautiful form of expression. Maybe I'll take lessons
when I get back to JBU. Just for fun.

There is most certainly a difference in the quality of life with
music as compared to without it. Especially making music
as opposed to not. I need to make more. I'm so thankful for
God's gift of music. Life's more colorful with it.

Secrets Secrets Are No Fun

Today was pretty good. After my Australian History class I
went to the Drumoyne house. There I studied for my
Theology with Gavin and others. The test is tomorrow. I
didn't feel like we got much done because we kept getting
side track talking. But it was fun.

Emily and Rachel are acting weird towards me. When I
first saw them in class today they sort of waved and laughed
like they knew something I didn't. Then I asked them what
they were laughing about and they said, "You'll find out
soon." Then later they kept asking me about my schedule
for this week. They are planning something but I have no
idea what. They said there's no need to worry about it. I'm
really curious about it now.

People just seem to be acting weird around me lately. I
don't know if it's all in my head or what. There was the
Emily and Rachel thing, then April walked by me and
asked if I wanted to go to Licarght (Sp?) the other student
housing where she lived. It's like people have been paying
more attention to me. I'm not sure what it is. Maybe it's me.
I mean, maybe I've changed since the choir tour and people
have noticed that I've been in a good mood about it. Who
knows, it's probably all in my head.

Choir practice was probably the highlight of my day. It was
kind of like reliving tour for a couple hours. When I saw
people I was like, "Hey I know you." I realized how many of
them I had gotten to know on tour. It was really fun. We had
a time to share thoughts about tour. Then we worked more
on O Solutaris Hostia. Incredible song. I think it's translated,
"Christ Who for Us was Slain." We will be singing in The
Gathering this Wednesday, which is like the chapel. I'm
definitely looking forward to it.

After choir I hung out on "the grassy knoll" and talked with
Jonno, Ben, Michelle, Renea, Cindy, Jackie, and Amy.
They're great people. It was kind of weird. As I was sitting
there with all of them (who were almost all Australians)
some of my American friends would walk by and kind of
look at me with them. Obviously they haven't really gotten
to know the Ausies as well as I have. It was just kind of
interesting to see people's reactions when they saw that I
got a long so well with the Australians.

I'd like to openly express my thankfulness to God for
this time. Life really doesn't get much better than this.

The Village

I went to Wesley Mission church today. It's downtown. I misread
the bus timetable and so I was very nearly late. I was getting all
worried about getting there on time. It worked out fine though.
Once again my lack of trust in God was displayed.

I went because the teaching was good the last time I went, and
I remembered that Maricka, a friend from choir, goes there. It
was good to see her again.

I studied for my Theology test today, and road bikes with Darren.
We also went to see The Village today. It was really good. But it
was an outrageous price - $14. About $10 US dollars but still,
that's a lot. And the theatre wasn't even that nice. The movie was
very well made, as to be expected. There were many beautiful
aspects including visual, mental and musical.

I'm really looking forward to choir practice tomorrow, as I always
do. We will probably learn some new songs. Plus I'll get to see
all my mates from tour.

Goodness

Well I'm back from tour. I had an incredible time as you
might have read. I'm sort of still riding the wave from
the excitement of the tour.

Today I spent the day doing homework, uploading
pictures, and stuff like that. I talked awhile with Sean
and my family. It was very good. Sean's time at St. Olaf
is going very well. I'm very happy for him, and thankful
that my prayers are being answered. I know how scary it
might be to have to figure out classes by yourself. But
it sounds like everything went fine. He made the St. Olaf
Symphony which is awesome. I'm so excited for him and
I can't wait to go to a concert.

It really stinks, I will only get to see him for about a day
when I get back before he has to go back to school.
Major bummer. I totally want to go up there to visit.

That's so weird for Michelle now that Sean's gone. I
feel bad that we can't be more involved in her life. I
can't wait to see her again. From now on, family times
will be that much more special.

I'm going to the Wesley Mission church tomorrow. I
think Maricka, one of the girls I got to know on tour,
goes there. So hopefully I meet up with her. It's also
probably the church closest to what I'm used to. Good
teaching.

God has been so good to me and my family. This past
week in particular has been such an incredible time for
both Sean and I. I can't thank God enough.

And I just realized that even when things aren't going
well, God is still good. It's who He is. It's unfortunate
that sometimes I try to make my circumstances attest
to God's goodness.

Tour Log

The following is my journal entries during the choir tour. I realize the
names mean nothing to you, but it's for my sake.


Sunday September 5th

Man I'm having a ball. This is such an incredible time. Being with
people all the time is great. It might get old by the end of the week,
but right now i can't imagine it.

There was a bit of a hiccup in our trip yesterday before we left. Our
sound equipment was too heavy for the bus when combined with
the weight of everything else. So we weren't even sure if we could
still go. But through prayers and putting heads together we (the
leadership) decided to have a van follow the bus with all the
equipment. But that didn't work to well so we decided to put someone
in the van to drive it.

The time in the bus on the way here went well. We saw snow on the
ground on the way but there wasn't show in Orange, our destination.
But it was still very cold.

Our first program went this morning. It was kind of an interesting
church. It was in a movie theatre. It was weird but it works.

Later tonight we did another show. We did our Kirk Franklin song it
was pretty rockin and everyone was getting into it. The audience
looked a little stunned. Not sure if they appreciated it. We had a great
time buggen our up there.

I'm getting to know some people better including Glen Marika, Renea
and some others. It's so incredibly fun.

Monday September 6th

So it's been another incredible day on choir tour. A very long day.
I'm pretty tired and it's only 8:35. This morning Glen and I got up
and our host family took us to a grade-school in Orange (the city
we were in). We did two programs for different age groups. And we
also did a workshop with them. It's basically where Dr. Johnston
gives tips or pointers to their school choir. It all wen smoothly.
"Brighter Day" and "Never Gonna Stop" are so fun. Everybody gets
so into it. I just can't describe the feeling one gets when jammin out
on stage. With great friends no less.

There's this guy in the front row named Keith that has a mic for
"Brighter Day" and sort of interacts with the crowd. In the music score
there are words printed for speach, like "Get your bounce on" and
other "black gospel" things to say. So Keith always says that stuff.
He's kind of random and crazy sometimes. So it's always entertaining
to see what he'll do on stage. It's funny because there's not one black
person in the choir and everybody knows it's all kind of cheesy,
but we just have a good time and laugh about it. Nobody cares much
about what people think about us. It's so great.

When I first heard that we were doing Kirk Franklin gospel songs, I
was kind of put off by it. But now I love it because it's so great to
just
let loose with everyone.

I talked with a girl named Michelle a bunch today. She's cool/fun.
She's a bass player in the band that accompanies us. We had a good
chat on the bus today, on the way to Dubbo. We've never really talked
much before. I was surprised when she sat down and started a
conversation with me. I enjoyed the company.

I also talked with Renea a bunch today. These people are very kind
and accepting of me. It really means the world to me. Renea is so kind
to all.

Tuesday September 7th

I have so much to write and little time. This morning we went to the
Dubbo Zoo. It was alright. I had seen all the animals before. Friends
made it fun though. I was in a group with Shannon, Gavin, Lauren,
Loraine, Phil, Chris, and Jackie.

We did a show for the Christian school. We sang "Dawn" and had to
use music. It pretty bad, so did "Sunset."

So I'm staying with this single guy who lives by himself out in the
middle of the country. For some reason Jonathan (a choir member)
didn't want to stay with this guy so I reluctantly agreed to swap
places.
I was kind of ticked about the whole thing because it meant being alone
with this guy. Now that I look back I can see God's hand in the
situation. You see, I got to stick around at the school, where a bunch
of friends were staying, for awhile. Peter, My host, works at the school
so it worked out nicely.

Tonight was incredible at the school. It was a group of about 20. We
were in this gym/stage area. Like the whole night we listened to
music while doing things like jumping off a trampoline onto a huge
matte. It's kind of hard to explain. Everyone was just being totally
carefree and having a good time. enjoying one another's company.

It was Lisa's birthday. So we all payed 5 bucks and some people
went to the store and got some groceries. Then we had a meal
cooked by the girls.

We talked and laughed a lot around the table. And we all said what
we are thankful for. It was such a meaningful time.

Afterwards we played more games. I even learned a little about how
to play Cricket.

It wasn't until after dinner that I actually started doing stuff rather
than
just watching. Doing stuff made the time 100 times more fun. To
relax and be yourself is so freeing. Before that, for some reason, I
was too self conscious to do much.

I talked with Lisa some today. Mostly about music that we like. She's
a very nice girl and I enjoyed talking with her. But she's too
controlling for me.

There are countless little experiences that I've had where I've
experienced kindness and acceptance from all of my friends here.
That has made this tour and my whole Australian trip an experience
that is one of the best in my life. God's grace is abundant to me.

Wednesday September 8th

Today we did a lot of traveling. About 8 hours worth. But it really
didn't
seem that long. We did a lot in the bus. A lot of talking and some
games.

I got to know Jonno Dollin? more today. He's cooler than I thought.
I thought he was kind of annoying before I talked with him much,
which was unfair I suppose.

Not much else happened. It was fun to be with people on the bus.
Some of those guys are so funny. Especially Tim, Keith and Greg. There
were so many funny things that happened.

I saw a lot more of the Australian countryside today. It's beautiful.
Some
of it reminded me a lot of Colorado. Very green and hilly. There were
some fields with bright yellow flowers. It was incredible.

I saw the satellite dish that was in the movie "The Dish" from a
distance.

Thursday September 10th

This is for yesterday. I was too tired last night to write.

We did a show at a Christian school and at Lisa's home church (I think).
We're in Lisa's home town staying with her family. We had some free
time so a bunch went to the bay nearby. I decided to stay and take a nap
and shower. It felt wonderful. We didn't get a chance to shower
yesterday
morning because we slept in a church.

Not a whole happened that was very interesting yesterday. Our shows
went very well. We're getting a lot better at the Bush songs and
"O Solutaris Hostia." That son is incredible. It's so beautiful. I'm
hoping
we can sing it for out practice when my parents and sister are here.

I can't believe it's already Friday. We have three more shows today then
we go home to Sydney. As far as I'm concerned, the more shows the
better. I love "Wondrous Cross." The arrangement is so powerful. It's
especially meaningful when I can focus on Jesus when singing.

Friday September 10th

The last day was great. We did three shows. Two in schools and one in
a church. At the first school after our shows there were little kids
coming
up to us and asking for our autographs. It made us feel important.

We kind of got carried away with the first show so we had to rush to the
next school. Everyone was scrambling to tear down and then set up
again at the other school. By this time we pretty much have our songs
down pat. Therefore it's more fun and we can focus on what matters -
communication, both with God and the audience.

At the church we had left our suits on some chairs and gone to eat.
When we came back we were all getting ready to change. Gavin, a
friend of mine, started taking my suite and putting it on. I was like,
"You
know that's my suite right?" He said, "Yeah." And he just kept putting
it
on and I was like, "Dude that's my suite, what the world are you doing?"
"I'm putting on your suite." So I just kind of stood there wondering
what
was going on. And I said, "You're being goofy Gavin." And then he said,
"Oh you're being serious with me?" And he then realized that it really
was my suite. He said he thought I was just joking with him. It was
hilarious. We got a good laugh about it.

On the way back to Sydney we all shared stories on the mic in the front
of the bus. The time went so fast because we were having a great time.
It was great because everyone knew everyone and could share in all
the funny stories of things that had happened on tour. Gavin told about
our situation with the suite. Everyone laughed.

I'm sad that it's all over, but very thankful for the experience.

Father of Lights

I'm so excited! Tomorrow I'm leaving for choir tour. It's going to be
so great. We get to ride in a big coach bus and stay with families. And
I have a great book (The Testament) and great music
and new Chuck Missler stuff to listen to. And it'll be cool to get to
know people better. Like it seems like the girls are the only mature
ones. But I guess there are guys I haven't talked with much yet.

Darren's already gone to Cans (sp?) so it's kind of boring around here.
And I didn't have classes today so that didn't help. But I did get a
lot done on my video dissection assignment which is due the week after
I get back. So I felt good about that.

I rode my bike to the mall today. It was nice to get out of the house.
Most of the roads are pretty busy. You're not supposed to ride on the
sidewalk so I tried to ride on the road most of the time. It was kind
of scary but also exciting to ride amongst all the traffic. Don't worry
Mom, I had a helmet on. It's the law here. But it was fun. I was Mr.
Independent.

I had to get a Bow Tie for choir and a birthday card for Wendy amongst
other things. I hate getting cards. None of them are very satisfying.

I had wanted to go see "The Village" today. It came out yesterday here.
But I decided to stay home and make sure I have everything ready for
tomorrow. I can't wait.

I was reading in James last night. Chapter 1 verse 17 stuck out to me.
It says, "Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above,
coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation
or shifting shadow." Doesn't that just sound awesome? Particularly
"Father of lights." I wonder what exactly that means. I'll bet there's
so much more to it than just 'father of good things' or something like
that. I wonder what relationship between light and God there really is.
Light, as studied by physicists, has never been understood. And also,
time. It seems to me that light, God, and time must somehow all work
together.

Have you ever wondered if God IS light? I don't mean just like a figure
of speech, but really light? Like maybe some part of His being is light
as we know it. That's perhaps why it's so weird and hard to understand.

I called Michelle last night to wish her a happy birthday. It was
really good to talk with her. I miss her so. She seems so aware. More
than I was at that age.

To my family, have a good trip.

To Sean, I'm praying for you.

To all, have a good week. I'll be back this time next week.

Michelle's Birthday

First of all I want to wish my sister Michelle a happy 12th birthday.
It is really hard to believe she's twelve already. I love her so much
and am very proud of her. I wish I could give her a big hug right now.
XOXOXOXO

I had to get up early today for choir practice. I always look forward
to it. It's usually pretty fun. I still don't feel like we know our
songs well enough. But it'll have to do. You could tell Dr. Johnston,
the director wasn't feeling very good about how much we knew the songs.
He kind of had this worried look and didn't say much. We really need
like another week of practicing. Oh well, as they say, no worries.

I read in the news the other day about the bus bombing in Israel. When
I saw the pictures it was almost eery to me because the bus looked
exactly like the kind I ride every day. I started to think about what
it would be like to have that happen. Obviously I can't fully imagine
it because terrorism is so foreign to me personally. It's always so
distant and unreal when it's on TV. But this time it hit a little bit
closer to home.

I was talking with a girl named Amber today about what we're doing for
breaks and about when we're leaving. We started talking about how sad
it will be to leave. Like we've gotten to know so many people and when
we leave we will probably never see them again. Most of them live on
the coasts. And we'll probably never be able to all get together as a
group again. Man it's really depressing to think about. Not counting
the breaks, next week will be the half way point. Unbelievable.

I checked out "The Testament" by John Grisham at the school library.
I've read a few chapters. It's really good so far. It's a monster of a
book though. Hopefully I can finish it before it's due back (I'm a slow
reader).

Tomorrow night will probably be the last time I'll post before choir
tour. I don't think I'll be able to post while I'm away unless I decide
to take my computer and find a place to hook up. However I will try to
write my thoughts in some way and then post them when I get back. That
won't be till Friday night of next week though.

Have a wonderful Birthday Michelle. I love you.

Packed Van

I got a haircut yesterday. Today was the first day that
everyone really saw it. I was surprised at how many
comments I got. Everyone seemed to notice. I guess
it was because it was such a big change, it had been
getting pretty long. I thought the cut was too short as I
normally do after a haircut. But a lot of people said they
liked it.

For chapel today we had a speaker that introduced us
to a "new method of worship." I don't remember what
she called it but it was like a scenario we went through
while rubbing our neighbors back, if that makes any cents.
It was like a story where we rub each other's backs
according to what's going on in the story. I was sitting next
to a guy and a girl. It was kind of awkward. I didn't really
know the guy and the girl was... a girl. Despite it's
awkwardness it did feel really good to have a message.
It's been awhile.

Tonight we had our weekly meeting with all the Americans.
It was a good time. It's always really fun and extra
meaningful to sing praise songs together in that group.
It's going to be really sad to have to leave everyone at
the end of the semester.

After the meeting, Dr. Johnston was going to take all of us
to our houses. He's always really nice like that. We walked
back to the school which was nearby and got into the van
there. I think the van holds about 13 people legally. There
were 23 of us. We all piled in. We were crammed and
everyone was laughing and being loud. It was actually quite
fun. It was one of those vans that has a really high ceiling.
So a bunch of us were actually standing up. Probably not
too safe. Nothing happened though.

Dr. Johnston is so good at corny jokes. Remind me to tell
you one of them.

I was able to talk with Derrick and Luke for a little before the
meeting. It's a shame that I don't get to see them much,
except at school when we're passing each other between
classes. Those guys are so great. It's hard to explain. I love
just joking around with them. They're two great friends that I
really admire. I feel like I know Derrick a little better than Luke
but I'm getting to know him too. I love talking with them about
real issues that we all go through. It seems like it's a lot easier
to talk with them about deep issues than it is with some people.
By deep I mainly mean spiritual.

We always call Luke the gov'na, short for governor, because
he's the ASC representative. It's so funny. Derrick came up
with that. Like it sounds stupid but it's funny. Derrick started
calling him that and now everyone knows him as it. A lot of
stuff like that goes on that I can't really explain. I wish I could.
You just have to experience it to understand. But it's great fun.

Relationships make or break life.